Hug From a Father

Words spoken years ago

cling to me like superglue Continue reading Hug From a Father

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Planning Not to Plan

These are the exact words my husband told me. He said, “Babe, from now on you are not allowed to plan, and I wont take no for an answer. Stop planning.”  Crazy right?! I had heard i before but I guess I either decided to prove him wrong or gave in; either way, this is one battle that I am so incredibly happy I lost. Planning not to plan has brought me more joy then planning out every second of every hour ever did.

I used to drive to work and pass time by decided what I would do and what order I would do things in after work. Before I even started the day I had my whole day full! No wonder I was feeling completely and totally worn out! If someone asked me if I had plans I would almost always think to myself; is that honestly a real question? Of course I have plans! Life cannot work if you do not have a plan! I would plan out my days where at first I had nothing planned because I couldn’t stand not having the day full. It only took one month of my husband working a late shift and not being home to stop my plans for me to completely and utterly drain myself. In that month, want to know how many times I binge watched Netflix, saw a friend, took time to  journal, or blogg, or get this; did nothing? Not. Once. I never did because I never planned it in, and heaven forbid I went against my plans ( something that it still very hard for me). Want to know what I did the first week of not planning anything after work? I watched way to many episodes of Jane the Virgin (don’t judge people ) , saw friends, sat outside and journaled, and still had time to cook and eat dinner and relax. I had no idea how much I could do, how many more people I could serve, and how much happier I would be by simply not planning.  I finally had time for myself as well as others. I had more meaningful conversations and more times to take on the blessings of each day. It is crazy how many more blessings you think of when you’re not constantly planning your next move.

So, lesson one: turns out that planning had become a horrible habit. I honestly thought that something crazy horrible would happen if I did not have a plan. When my husband told me that I was not allowed to plan out anything I had to ask him what I would even do when I got home? I couldn’t just not do anything are you nuts? You guys, I had to be told that it was totally fine to literally pace up and down the hallway if I felt like it to decide to do nothing and sit back on the couch. It was FINE. You know what is even crazier? I did just that and get this- everything was freaking fine. WHAT.

It took me a couple of weeks to really nail down not planning. I would still and sometimes still do plan my day out in the morning and have to consciously stop myself and think of something else. I found out that by not planning I got more done. I have to give myself some credit sometimes; because plan or no plan I am an do-er at heart. I will get things done that absolutely need to get done even if I didn’t plan it because that is how I am.  Obviously there are things that must be planned. Vacations, meetings, appointments, but I challenge you to take everything else off. You may be surprised and how much time you actually do have, and how many things will still get done even if it’s not planned.

Lesson two: I learned that I can say no and that nothing bad actually happens if you change your plan. Things are still good to go people! Nothing has burned down, I did not forget to eat or pay bills or take out the dog. I worked out and studied. I actually saw friends more, and felt like I could help and serve others more because doing so did not need to fit into any sort of plan!

Ahh the freedom of not planning.

Try it. Give me your feedback. I am curious to see how others respond to the challenge of planning to not plan. You got this!

Written By: JoJo Ossmen

The Word No One Wants to Say; is Exactly What you Need to Say

 

Suicide. Still do this day the word jabs my heart-strings. Still to this day I have to take an extra breath and ponder how wonderfully amazing life is; and how glad I am to be experiencing it. I take moments to embrace its greatness and say a prayer for those who are no longer with us. While wishing they could feel the joy that life gives ; but knowing that they are in a better place and embraced by the Lords love. To those of you who have lost a loved one, my heart and love goes out to you. Still to this day I can’t get over the word-suicide. I kinda hate it; and maybe that’s why it is a discussion rarely brought up or talked about. This is something we need we change. Because it is something that we NEED to be talking about, educated on, and comfortable enough with that if or when someone does bring it up it is welcomed, embraced even! Because there is so much more to life and every one should be told that. I know that because I stayed, because I brought up the dreaded word, I got to fulfill one of my biggest dreams in my athletic career. I graduated with a degree, I made life long friends, and even better, I met my husband. We get to create a life time of memories and laughs and adventures. Because I stayed, because I brought up the topic that so many run from.  If you, or anyone you know is struggling hear me out when I say that LIFE IS WORTH IT. There is light ahead. There is light even when you don’t feel its presence. There is always light. So Don’t you quit! Don’t you stop! Prove to yourself that you can do this! There is better times ahead that you and those around you will forever be grateful for. Keep on going! I remember how weird and vulnerable I felt when I reached out and called my friend. We were so young and nothing this serious had ever come up before. I can’t thank her enough for sitting there and staying  calm as I said these horrible things. I remember when my dad let me scream and cry in the car as he picked me up from practice because I didn’t understand the things I was feeling or thinking. Not once did he let me stay in the dark. No matter how weird, awkward, or uncomfortable you feel about speaking out, DO IT. Life is worth the conversation, and it is worth getting help. That I promise! I promise that Heavenly Father knows your pain, he feels your sorrows and he is cheering you on today tomorrow and everyday. He will never give up on you so you cannot give up on yourself. He wants you feel the love that life gives, the warmth of the sun, the happiness of new beginnings. He wants you to know that it life more than worth it; you are more then worth it. SO STAY. The world is a better place because you are here. 

If you are struggling with suicide there are many outlets for you to reach out to, by clicking on www.thelionheartsociety.com resource page you will find countless places to go to. You are worth it. If it is something that has impacted your life even in the slightest don’t be afraid to speak out. Be an advocate for someone else who needs your strength, your story, and all who you are. Say the word that no one whats to say. 

“ I testify that bad days come to an end, that faith always triumphs, and that heavenly Fathers Promises are Always Kept”

“ Don’t give up, don’t you quit. You keep walking, You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead… you keep your chin up. It will be all right in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come.”

“ Christ knows better than all others that the trials of life can be very deep, & we are not shallow people if we struggle with them.”

– Elder Holland

Written By: JoJo Ossmen

 

Love Them Through It: An Open Letter to Loved Ones

My wife has anxiety. It is challenging; I may understand some things about it, but I will never understand it completely. I don’t have a full grasp of anxiety’s true feelings because it’s something that I didn’t grow up around or experience. At first I HATED it. I wanted her to be a “normal person.” Then her anxiety attacks and anxiety filled days became more apparent that was when we were dating; I came to the terms that this is something that she lives with. This is her “normal.” Continue reading Love Them Through It: An Open Letter to Loved Ones

The Highly Sensitive Person

When I walk down the neighborhood street, I see the sun glistening through the leaves on the trees, casting a shadow on the sidewalk ahead. When I go on a hike, the smell of the pine trees and the feeling of the sun on my forehead radiates through my body. The sound of a fireplace, crackling in the background of a cozy evening soothes my soul. Everything is peaceful. Everything is perfect. Continue reading The Highly Sensitive Person